You are hereBlogs / dr-no's blog / 59m in the Life of an Ambulance Control Centre

59m in the Life of an Ambulance Control Centre


Posted by Dr No on 21 December 2012

alexander_graham_bell.jpgThese days, nothing really happens until it happens on social media. Apart from curmudgeonly old duffers like Dr No, anybody who is anything is busy on twitter. Why, even HRH is on twitter! The NHS, it seems, is all over twitter like pigeons all over Trafalgar Square. Hospital trusts, ambulance control centres, continence control services, you name them, there they are on twitter, tweeting away, like pigeons all over…

In case he is missing something – perhaps he is, since everyone is at it – Dr No decided to observe in real time the emerging tweets of one NHS twitter account over a period of one hour. In the interests of openness and accountability, he presents his observations and, being twitter, it should be read from the bottom of the post upwards. But then, Dr No has never suggested twitter ever made any sense…

1 new Tweet

1m

CAMPAmb @campamb
@_dr_no_ — he toast. Wow! How cool is that! #CAMPAmbTweetfest
Expand


3m

CAMPAmb @campamb
@_dr_no_ come out quietly, you are surrounded #CAMPAmbTweetfest
Expand


5m

CAMPAmb @campamb
Uniform on scene at @_dr_no_ within 6 minutes of start of call #CAMPAmbTweetfest
Expand


8m

CAMPAmb @campamb
Tracie calls budgie lady and advises H&S incinerate budgie in sealed tin immediately #avianflu #CAMPAmbTweetfest
Expand


10m

CAMPAmb @campamb
Uniform on their way to @_dr_no_ & Tracie checking with SWOT to check if they are already aware. Cool #CAMPAmbTweetfest
Expand


11m

CAMPAmb @campamb
It can be useful if you leave the phone off the hook after calling us. That way we can listen in to what your saying #gotyournumber #CAMPAmbTweetfest
Expand


19m

CAMPAmb @campamb
Piss off @_dr_no_ we know where you live #secretpolice #CAMPAmbTweetfest
Expand


20m

CAMPAmb @campamb
Budgie crew abort because budgie has died #piningforthefjords #CAMPAmbTweetfest
Expand


29m

CAMPAmb @campamb
Remember, if you've had D&V, don't visit friends or relatives in hospital til you have been symptom free for 48 hrs #bogoff #CAMPAmbTweetfest
Expand


32m

CAMPAmb @campamb
First ambulance already on its way & Tracie checking with Fire Service to check if they are already aware. Cool #CAMPAmbTweetfest
Expand


35m

CAMPAmb @campamb
Next call from Police, requesting our attendance at a 3 bike pile up. Very few details at present #doconabike #CAMPAmbTweetfest
Expand


39m

CAMPAmb @campamb
Otherwise, how can we come and get you? #secretpolice #CAMPAmbTweetfest
Expand


42m

CAMPAmb @campamb
One of the most important things we need to establish when you call us is your location or address #CAMPAmbTweetfest
Expand


45m

CAMPAmb @campamb
Tracie has worked in the control for nine weeks, most experienced leader on the team. Wow. Cool #CAMPAmbTweetfest
Expand


46m

CAMPAmb @campamb
@_dr_no_ We are not giving any identifiable details like addresses, plumages or names. We are always v careful about budgie confidentiality #pissoff #CAMPAmbTweetfest
Expand


48m

CAMPAmb @campamb
Last year, we received 3,910 calls where beak-stuck-in-peanut was identified as the main issue at the time of the call. Wow #CAMPAmbTweetfest
Expand


50m

CAMPAmb @campamb
Tracie calls the budgie caller back to get more info. The budgie has lots of problems so its important to try to find out what's wrong #deadparrot #CAMPAmbTweetfest
Expand


53m

CAMPAmb @campamb
Straight on to another call - a very anxious lady calling on behalf of her husband who she's locked in the toilet. Wicked #CAMPAmbTweetfest
Expand


55m

CAMPAmb @campamb
Tracie tries to get more info from the caller but she's so anxious she hangs up #CAMPAmbTweetfest
Expand


56m

CAMPAmb @campamb
As budgie has fallen off its perch, she's advising the caller not to move it before the crew arrives #CAMPAmbTweetfest
Expand


57m

CAMPAmb @campamb
The whole time Tracie is talking to the caller, an ambulance is already on its way #CAMPAmbTweetfest
Expand


59m

CAMPAmb @campamb
Tracie has just taken a call from an anxious elderly lady whose budgie has got its beak stuck in a peanut #CAMPAmbTweetfest
Expand


59m

CAMPAmb @campamb
Sat with senior team leader and emergency care co-ordinator Tracie who started work @6:30am. Cool. #CAMPAmbTweetfest
Expand


3 comments:

Hi Dr No,

Can't make head or tail of that. Re HRH, I hope you're not making the faux pas that the idiotic commentators on the Royal Pageant made when they referred to Her Majesty as Her Royal Highness. And it's gin o' clock old boy..

https://twitter.com/Queen_UK

Julie - Dr No stands corrected on the initials - all the more embarrassing as DN knew about the faux pas earlier this year. One hopes that Her Majesty has the grace to forgive a careless humble servant. He did however see a number of Right Royal twitter accounts including the one you link to, and this one which, if it is a spoof, certainly fooled Dr No: https://twitter.com/BritishMonarchy. Her Majesty's movements and and other material appear there, so, to that extent, Her Majesty is on twitter. Now - where's that sharpener got to?

I don’t understand the allure of Twitter at all or understand Twitter itself and it bothers me not. I don’t even understand how to have a ‘conversation’ on Twitter and I couldn’t care less.

I don’t like Facebook (inane), tried Google + (Richard Branson’s my ‘friend’ (!) – even though I don’t know him) and can’t be bothered with that either. People on Twitter, Facebook and Google + want to ‘friend’ me all the time and although I find that warm and cuddly – I kind of don’t ‘friend’ them as I don’t know who they are - and I really don't care if they are undecided about washing their hair tonight.

Your 59m is hilarious as an accurate description of the inaneness of Twitter ‘conversation’ by those who Tweet for the sake of it

“We are not giving any identifiable details like addresses, plumages or names. We are always v careful about budgie confidentiality.”

Oddly enough I read somewhere today of the dangers of inadvertently disclosing patient info on ‘social media’ but for the life of me cannot remember where and despite searching have not been able to locate it.

Julie – I clicked onto your link and I can say in earnest it is the only Twitter account I have seen that I may actually visit again…

Anna :o]


Add a comment...

Will show as anonymous if no name added

If added, your name will be a link to the address you enter

If left blank, first few words of comment will be used

• Allowed HTML tags: <a> <em> <strong> <cite> <code> <ul> <ol> <li>
• Web page addresses and e-mail addresses turn into links automatically
• Lines and paragraphs break automatically
 

NOTE: Dr No's spam filter can be somewhat overzealous. If your comment has been wrongly rejected, Dr No apologises, and asks that you let him know (via Contact Form in side-bar). Many thanks.